Words in the heart cannot be taken

I had a conversation with a friend this week that has sort of stayed with me – haunted me if you will. We’ve all had those moments, when someone says something that just…sticks with you and becomes all you can think about.

We were talking about books.Specifically we were talking about the books that have left an impact on us,. The books we just can’t let go of. The ones that stay with us, guide us. Sometimes without us even realising it.

Eleven years ago, when I stood up in front of my entire college and all their family and friends and delivered the graduation speech, I wonder how many of them knew that I was quoting from Michael Crichton or Terry Pratchett? Probably not many. But that doesn’t make those words any less valid. Or any less important.

There are books that I come back to, over and over and over again. Books that speak to my soul.

There are words that dance in my blood. Words written by strangers that speak to the very heart of me. Words that have become part of who I am.

And that is an amazing thing.

I was overwhelmed by the knowledge that there were people out there in the world who have no idea how they shaped me as a person, how they saved my life, how they changed how I thought and how they made me a better person.

And maybe, just maybe, there is someone out there who has had their life changed by something I have written. There might not be, but there might be.

I’ve been re-reading Discworld from the start. I have the last book but I haven’t read it yet. It’s been sitting on my dresser for a long time. And honestly, I just don’t think I’m ready yet. Because if I read it then I have to admit that it’s over. And I’m just not ready for that yet. It had been a part of my life for over twenty five years – longer even – the Colour of Magic was published the year after I was born. So pretty much all my life there has been this other, wonderful, strange, funny, heartbreaking world that has existed in parallel. I’m not ready to let go of a series, of a writer who changed me in so many ways. A writer I never met who made me a better person, who made me think and feel and love and fight. A writer who taught me that I didn’t need to conform, that I didn’t need to care what other people thought, that I didn’t need to be someone I wasn’t. That personal wasn’t the same as important, that infinity is duck egg blue, that I should be wary of any item that weighs less than it’s operational manual, that I should always look under my bed in case there’s a man there (you never know your luck) and most importantly :

Words in the heart cannot be taken.

Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay, spoken by Dorfl

And so, go forth, find your own words, those words that will imprint on your heart and soul never to be erased.

they cannot be taken.

Love, always,



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Balls Deep

seven-sins-of-shakespeare-posterThere are many differences between film and stage. I love both formats. I love the creativity I can express through film, but I love the intimacy that comes with the stage. What I tend to overlook time and time and time again is the one thing that makes me deeply unhappy – rehearsals.

Currently I am in the final stages of rehearsals for Henry IV part 2 as part of the 400 anniversary of Shakespeare season with Bigger Than Us Productions. It’s been an amazing summer, and I’ve had the opportunity to work with some of the most talented people Northern Ireland has to offer – and yes, I am a little bit smug about the fact that I got everyone one of the actors I wanted – all my first choices.

I have a wonderful mix of people – from teenagers on their first performance through to seasoned pros. There is a wonderfully rich mix of people involved – a seventeen year old taking on the very meaty role of Pistol with an energy that frankly sinister, a radio DJ playing Poins with with the best facial expressions I have ever seen, a young Bardolph providing MILES of homoerotic moments, a stand up comedian playing Francis with a cheek and presence that far surpasses her years, a stately Hal played by the most regal young gent I have ever come across (even if he is a bad influence) and my Holy Trinity – my Doll, my Mistress Quickly and my beloved Falstaff – the sharp Mistress, the young Doll and the wonderful Falstaff who holds them all in the palm of his hand.

Last night we had a wonderful blocking session and it’s easy to see how it’s all come together now. I certainly feel a lot less stressed and worried than I did a few weeks ago, and once again I was reassured watching my wonderful, wonderful cast work together in harmony. I don’t think I’ve ever worked with a group of people who acted and reacted so INSTINCTIVELY with each other, who used the space, who weren’t afraid to get physical, who gave it their all.

This is a far cry from the adaptations of the past – it’s Henry IV set in ‘organised’ Belfast. It’s sinister, it’s threatening, but it’s also fucking hilarious – because if anyone knows how to make fun of themselves, the Northern Irish do. It’s threats and violence and lust and greed and gluttony and sex and a dick joke every other line and everyone works in ‘construction’.

So, with two weeks to go I’m both terrified and excited.

My parents are coming to see it too – my mum came to see a performance of a play I wrote earlier this summer and it seemed to be a bit of an eye opener for her – I think she finally realises that when I’m sat behind my laptop for hours on end I’m not playing Candy Crush.

So this is it, the final countdown.

It will be awesome.

Love, etc,



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Shakespeare and Opportunities

Okay, so i know I haven’t updated a lot lately, but honestly, things have been INSANE.

As many of you know personal issues caused me to step out of the industry for a long time. Simply put, Northern Ireland is a small place, and the arts in Northern Ireland is even smaller, so you run into the same people over and over. And there were people I just couldn’t be in the same room as. And it made me profoundly unhappy until one day I just cracked, threw my hands in the air and cried ‘Fuck it!’

I haven’t looked back.

Since I decided to return to the arts I have been very fortunate and surprised and inundated with thing to do. I had a play I wrote produced and performed, I’m currently directing Henry IV as part of the 400 anniversary of Shakespeare as part of Bigger Than Us ‘Seven Sins of Shakespeare’ and I have both a low budget feature and a play I wrote in the early stages of production.

On top of that I am also now on the editorial board for the Community Arts Partnership  and have enrolled on several courses, including creative writing at Oxford and film school.

It’s been….busy.

Right now there is so much going on, so many opportunities and I am grabbing them with both hands.

No one and nothing is ever going to tell me I’m not good enough, or that I don’t work hard enough, or that I don’t deserve it ever again. I listened to that for years to the point where I believed it myself, and while I know now that it was that person’s own failures and insecurities and inadequacy that was fuelling their words and behaviour, it was my fault that I listened to them. That I LET them influence me, hold me back. But no more.

So if I can tell you guys anything, I’ll tell you this – you can do anything you want. Be anything you want. And fuck what anyone else says.

Love, encouragement, hugs and nudges in the right direction,


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Okay, so I’m a bit (understatement) excited! On Ao3 I got a comment from another user who had commissioned some fan art for my work!


This morning I woke up and in my inbox was lovely, lovely email from the poster in question, the sweet Lydia, and aside from her wonderful email, she also included not one, but TWO pics done by the amazing tiniestjohn.

I’m actually beyond overwhelmed right now.

But I just wanted to say thank you, thank you so, so much, and Lydia, readers like you are the reason we do this.

AO3 is a wonderful place where we can express ourselves, celebrate ourselves and our fandoms and never, ever be judged for it. It’s be a sanctuary when I needed it, and a source of inspiration and has led me to reading work from some try wonderful and amazing writers, and meeting people I adore. AO3 truly is my spiritual home, and I think any one of the folks there would say the same.

So thank you, thank you to everyone who reads my fic or my original work, thank you to everyone I follow who’s updates are much anticipated, and thank you to everyone who has ever uttered a word of support or encouragement. It means everything. Honestly.

I love you all.




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How it feels to watch your play performed

13882460_10155138093150190_9027038769801469382_nYesterday, Friday 29 July ’16, I, along with some dear friends and my mum, went along to The Black Box to see my one act play ‘To Ten’ performed by the wonderful folks at LunchBox Theatre here in Belfast.

LunchBox aims to develop the work of emerging playwrights from the North of Ireland, and provide directing and performing opportunities to local artists.

I’ve been asked a lot over the last day about what it’s like to watch your work and not be involved in the production.

Well, in a way it’s great. I get to do my job and then hand it over to someone else to do theirs. As a writer my job is to write. As a director or an actor it’s their job to bring those words to life. So there is a sort of detachment that you need to have in order to be a professional writer. You can’t be precious about your words. You need to to understand that edits have to happen, sometimes changes have to be made, sometimes the tone is different, sometimes the characters aren’t how you imagined. AND THAT’S ALL FINE.

Seriously. As a writer I write. That’s my job. It’s not my job to police how other people interpret those characters or that situation. I can’t stand behind everyone reading my work and correct their interpretation of it.

And that’s one of the most exciting things about script writing. I get to see it for the first time, just like everyone else in the audience. And that is a wonderful pleasure.

But it’s also terrifying.

I was worried that it would be a disaster. That the actors would be awful. That the director had screwed it up. That no one would laugh.

So I sat, terrified, anxious and sweating like an ice cube in hell while I watched and waited.

And I had nothing to worry about.

There is nothing like that wonderful moment of the first audience laugh. That moment when the words and the direction and the acting all come together in one wonderful instant.

And they laughed. And laughed. Fuck, I laughed, and I knew what all the jokes were. But the delivery of them was all new to me, and it was like a whole new joke.  And that, I think, is what it’s really like to watch your work performed. It’s like you are hearing it all for the first time.

Yesterday it all came together in a way I hadn’t expected. The audience enjoyed it, the actors were utterly amazing and absolutely hilarious with a wonderful sense of timing, physical presence and self awareness that enabled them to make the audience laugh and cringe in equal measure, and the director, who is still a student himself and has no bloody right to be so damn talented at that age, really pulled it all out of the bag and brought the whole thing to life.

Honestly, I was so proud to have those people speaking my words. I couldn’t have asked for better.

And so now, a rest. Until next week at least.

Love, etc,



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Rethinking Shakespeare

I’m very pleased to be able to tell you all that I’m directing a vignette as part of Bigger Than Us Productions ‘Seven Sins of Shakespeare’ event at the South Bank Playhouse in September. See here for more details: Bigger Than Us – Seven Sins

As most of you know I’ve been working away in a little bubble recently and haven’t had much of a chance to play with others, so to speak. So this was a great opportunity for me, and I’m really excited about getting to work on this.

It’s been wonderful to speak with the other directors involved and to see so many people getting excited about Shakespeare, looking at it in a fresh and exciting way. I admit I was very overwhelmed and came away from the first meeting thinking my idea was complete shit compared to some of the wonderfully creative takes on some of the plays chosen. I won’t give too much away, but let’s just say I’m glad I won’t be the one mopping up at the end of the night.🙂

Each play focuses on one sin, and the variety of plays is wonderful – with some lesser performed plays getting the spotlight shone on them. An at just 15 minutes each the whole event is a wonderful opportunity to sample Shakespeare for newcomers and old fans alike.

I’m directing Gluttony (which my friends this is hilarious given my other food blog and obsession with cooking) and am focusing on Henry IV and in particular Falstaff and his preoccupation with food and wine and women. Hopefully it will be as amusing on stage as it is in my head.

The show is running from the 22-24 September and is set to be a great experience. Hope to see some of you there, and I’ll keep you all updated as we get nearer the time.

Love, etc,


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Queer in a modern Ireland


Pride kicked off in Dublin and London this week – Belfast doesn’t have theirs until late July – incidentally the parade is the day after my play debuts, so we’re all hanging around for the whole weekend. But it’s got me thinking about what being queer in Ireland really means.

For those who don’t know Ireland is actually two countries and one country all at once – blame the St Andrew’s agreement – which means that you can be Irish, British and Northern Irish ALL AT ONCE – including dual citizenship and holding two passports.

And while in some ways Northern Ireland is amazing, sometimes it is so fucking backward that it’s embarrassing. And when it comes to gay rights the backwardness is not only stifling, but embarrassing.

In 2015 we held a vote on gay marriage – a basic human right, yeah? – in which NI OVERWHELMINGLY voted FOR gay marriage (70%) but it was shot down because of the stupid power sharing executive we have here – who are more concerned with bitching with each other and trying to score argument points on ‘principle’ than any of them are with actual politics or the welfare of the people they represent. And so the DUP (rather ironically named the DEMOCRATIC Unionist Party) decided that nope, they weren’t having gay marriage because it would be an insult to the sanctity of marriage in the traditional Christian sense.

Let’s bear in mind that at the time of that decision Peter Robinson was First Minister – his wife Iris Robinson openly stated that homosexuality was an abomination and that abortion was against God’s will while she was banging a 19 year old and conducting a sting of dubious property deals. But hey, us queers in a committed monogamous relationship are the ones to be vilified. Hmmmm.

When Peter Robinson left government and was replaced by Arlene Foster I actually had high hopes. I had, in a previous life, worked as a mid level civil servant in Ms Foster’s Department and had generally found her to be a level headed, intelligent and kind person. So you can imagine how betrayed I felt when I realised that the person I had professionally admired was just another muppet who shouldn’t have power.

Much as I generally don’t like Stephen Nolan (don’t know him personally, I’m sure he’d a nice bloke but his broadcasting style is not to my liking) I seriously respected him for the following interview: nolan vs alene re. same sex marriage

‘What is democratic about blocking that vote?’

And there we have it, Stephen Nolan asking the question we all asked.And the anser? Well… be prepared to be angry.

Arlene Foster (when asked why the DUP didn’t accept the majority vote from the people of Northern Ireland regarding gay marriage) : Because we have a mechanism to protect the institution of marriage.

Yeah. I’m gonna let you stew on that for a few seconds.

Now, I will hold my hands up as divorcee and say that yeah, my first marriage didn’t work out. But shit happens and we are all adults. That DOES NOT mean that I don’t take marriage seriously. And here’s the thing – I got a registry office marriage. No church, no religion involved, yet it was still a ‘marriage’ – so where does the religion come into things regarding gay marriage when about half of all NI marriages are registry office, non religious services? Not only that, but what about us queers who are religious? Like me? Might be a surprise, but yeah, I take my faith pretty seriously. And no, I don’t think God has an issue with who I am attracted to (made in his image, shall not judge etc) and neither do the 2 clergymen I know well.

Obviously this is a straw poll based I conducted in casual conversation over 20 minutes, but from experience it’s pretty indicative of the NI population in general – NO ONE CARES WHO YOU ARE FUCKING.

I’ll not even go into how Foster tries to justify her bigoted opinion by saying that basically it’s all fine because we have civil partnerships – while completely ignoring the fact that it takes away a basic human right from thousands of people to deny them a marriage.

Now, note the last minute or so of the interview where Arlene Foster very awkwardly avoids the question of whether she would attend a gay marriage of one of her kids – I think we can all tell the answer to that from her response.

And so, ladies, gents, others, you see the shit we put up with in NI on a daily basis regarding sexuality vs religion.

For some reason people seem to think I must not either understand or follow a religion because I’m queer – they are continually surprised to find otherwise. And even more so when they discover I know the texts just as well, and often better than they do.

So, while we are on religion (and sorry for the non religious folks, but bear with me here) let’s look at scripture:

James 4:12 There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?

Who indeed.

Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

And is this assuming that queers aren’t faithful? Doubt it.

Here’s the thing, there is A LOT of bullshit bigotry surrounding homosexuality, but it basically comes down to this:

Galatians 5:14 For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.”


Romans 13:9 The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery,” “You shall not murder,” “You shall not steal,” “You shall not covet,” and whatever other command there may be, are summed up in this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself.” 10 Love does no harm to a neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law.

What those Christian Fascists like to spout are two passages of the bible – both from Leviticus, which, let’s be honest is a bit of a cunt of a book when it comes to basic human compassion.  But  hey-ho. there’s always Timothy to fall back on – have you shaved? cut your hair? eaten lobster/crab/prawns/clams? Got a tattoo? Have your ears pierced? Damn, desecrated your body. Do you wear mix fabric (all you polyester wearers are fucked) or do you wear expensive fabric? (silk? hahaha, you are fucked too). Is that a wedding ring I see? Is it gold? Silver? Platinum? Well HO.LI.SHIT. congrats, your token of matrimony and conformity has basically condemned to you hell according to the BIBLE  you fucking preach at me every fucking day.

I have a serious issue with people telling telling others they are going to hell ‘because the Bible says so’ while all the time flaunting their own disregard of the ‘rules’ – if you are going to use religion as a reason to oppress then YOU CAN’T FUCKING CHERRY PICK.

And so, here we are. In 2016 where many members of the population are denied basic human rights because one small group of politicians disregarded a population poll on the issue because they fear for the sanctity of marriage (unless of course it’s there own, where spousal abuse and infidelity are just fine).

And so, while I have pride in myself and my loved ones and pride in my countrymen, I don’t have so much pride in our politics.

Wishing I had something more cheerful.




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This man has no business teaching kids

Today a blog post by a school principle has been gathering attention on the net, mostly because of the massive amounts of STUPID it contains. Seriously, my blood is boiling just reading it. Parents of the kids at his school should seriously be looking at whether he is up to the job – because I for one don’t think he is.

The whole post is about how children should basically have their reading choices policed by their parents because children can’t understand the difference between fact and fiction or some such shite. Basically it comes down to kids are stupid and need their parents to restrict their intellectual growth and development simply because this one guy lacked the mental ability to tell the fact that orcs aren’t real.

The guy in question is one Graeme Whiting who works at the private Acorn School in Gloucestershire. The school’s ‘about’ page has a few choice statements about the school’s policy:

designed to engage and cultivate the intellectual ability of each and every child. The school’s decision not to participate in state examinations means that pupils can continue to enjoy a diverse range of subjects throughout their time at school, and can discover their potential at their own pace


he school continues to place a great emphasis on subjects that help to develop students’ creativity and self-expression.

Which, you know, as a parent, I think sounds great. However, the blog post he made contradicts all of this.

You can read the blog post HERE for however long it stays up. I’ve copied it below because there are a few things I’d like to say about it.

The Imagination of the Child

Written by Graeme Whiting

Human beings have a conscious and unconscious brain. Stored in the latter, sometimes deeply entrenched in that mysterious, sensitive part of our brain, lie the secrets of our past, our inhibitions, our common habits and all the events that have formed each of our lives since we became conscious beings. Secrets of our emotions, our passions, and our hurt, can be lying there. In today’s world of transformational humans, millions of therapists worldwide make a living from trying to understand, and reveal, by various methods, what lies within the subconscious brain of those patients who come for help because of anxieties and fears, experiences and memories, often pictorial images of events that helped to shape their lives; predominantly bad memories, which is why they seek therapy.

Many of the current methods for trying to open up our subconscious brain are open to both praise and criticism, but my view is that we should strive, as human beings, to ensure that children are protected during their developmental years from negative experiences that linger within their subconscious and may prevent them from moving forward towards adulthood, unencumbered by such memories, particularly inappropriate images or text that confuses their imagination, as they do not have thinking brains until, at the earliest, fourteen years of age. The child can then move towards more conscious thought as adulthood looms. An eighteen-year-old doesn’t suddenly get a developed thinking as a right, or as a gift, just because in the eyes of the state they have reached adult age!

Ok, I’ll admit, none of us want to deliberately expose our kids to negative things, and it’s our instinct as parents to try and shield them and protect them.

This morning, I recalled the many memories that lie deep in my own subconscious; the deaths of my loving parents, my three brothers, my wife and perhaps even more deeply entrenched are the experiences I had as a young child growing up after the war in a very different England. I recalled vivid pictures of the school bullies, and of the grim-faced teachers as they beat me. I can remember their smelly clothes, and can recall those smells and facial grimaces when they carried out the barbaric punishment that was meted out to many young, poor children, in the nineteen-fifties. I have dealt with those images and memories without the help of a therapist and I feel I have put them away from my daily life, to be recalled if they need to be. Imagination is so rich and important that I cannot understand why any parent would not actively prevent exposure to modern-world electronic gadgets, screens, films and literature that will encumber the minds and especially the imagination of their children. Let beauty reign within the subconscious minds of our children, not fear and disturbing images cultivated by their amazing brains.

I love the first lines of ‘The Endymion’ by John Keats:

‘A thing of beauty is a joy for ever,
Its loveliness increases,
It will never pass into nothingness’……..

I am from a large family and my life as a child was not easy, but today I reflected on the care my parents showered on me, and indeed the care and understanding I received from specific times in my education; just one teacher actually, but it took until I had left school, and the army, to realise that that one teacher positively affected my life, and still does. Such a wise lady!

The more I reflect the more I believe that the concept of The Acorn School was hatched on a deeply unconscious level and it has taken most of my life to fully understand the reasons why I chose to create this beautiful school. Is it not a most unusual school? It may take the readers of this blog a lifetime to fully appraise what the school represents, and why I chose to give children an education based on moral values and individual teaching in each class of children, which enriches their imagination.

There’s nothing here that contributes to the discussion really, but I pasted it in the spirit of full disclosure.

At school I had a passion for literature; indeed I felt that by the age of thirty I had read all the books I wanted to read.

And THIS, this right here, is where the alarm bells started to ring. By the age of thirty I was in deep despair because I knew that in all my life I would never be able to read all the books I wanted to.

Those books were a strong influence and created in me feelings about what should be read by children, who cannot discern or understand, and these books helped to shape me as a human being.

Which basically comes down to how it was alright for him to read them but no one else. I find this view on children to be extremely patronising to be honest. My daughter is 9 and reads a lot so I know what she understands and what she doesn’t. And, and this is the important bit, SO DOES SHE. When she chooses books she chooses ones that fire her imagination, books that have something to say to HER. If she doesn’t grasp something she puts it aside. She’s not stupid.

Of course, there are many wonderful experiences that are also locked behind that door, but what concerns me with the modern world is that there seem to be no doors that cannot be opened by young children. Children can contrive, they can lie and they can get their own way; they can also be wonderful and beautiful if parents take the time to try to understand what childhood really is! Children are innocent and pure at the same time, and don’t need to be mistreated by cramming their imagination that lies deep within them, with inappropriate things.

Children have always been like this. Trust me – I used to be one. So did this guy, but he seems to have forgotten that. Sure, the internet etc makes things a little easier for kids, but honestly, think back to your own childhood – trading dirty magazines with your friends, watching 18 movies that your parents didn’t know about. Children will ALWAYS find a way. When I was a kid we had no internet and all the racy books in the library were in their own room – that didn’t stop a 13 year old managing to check out most of that stock before the year was out – where there is a will there is a way.

Parents walking around a modern shopping centre with their children are magnetised by the colourful and graphic attraction of the new book cover, and often, very little of the text is reflected in the beautiful and attractive cover. Such colourful covers attract children to the point of mesmerising them, and they make demands of their parents stating that they want one because every other child at school has one!

Wow. This is so incredibly insulting to parents. How dare this stupid man suggest that we parents (I’m choosing to ignore that I’m a writer because I really don’t think I could face attack this from both sides right now) are that stupid as to be lured by ‘colourful’ things like we are moronic lemmings. And personally, I would think that if every child at school is reading a book and that makes other kids want to read then SURELY that is a good thing? Why wouldn’t I want my kid to read more?

Sensationalism is the key for marketing literature in today’s world. Publishers and authors don’t really care who reads what, as long as they achieve high sales figures, and they go to great lengths to create those pictorial covers that hide the sometimes demonic, influential and unacceptable words that may lie within the text.

Okay, and NOW it gets personal. Who the FUCK does this man think he is? Is he an author? No. So how the FUCK would he know what we think about what we do? Does he know how little money we make? Does he know how many writers out there have written for years and years before being published simply because they LOVE to write. We are doing a job we love. Just like, I would say, he is doing a job he loves. I assume he gets paid for it. Because he gets paid am I to therefore assume that he doesn’t CARE about it? No. So what gives him the right to think that about me / us?

Gone are the classics, and when I asked my wife to write a reading list for the children of my school, many of the books she recommended were hard to find. A trip to the Amazon website revealed that thousands of great books for children can be bought for less than the cost of postage! Indeed, sets of classical literature, the stories that I read as a young buy, could be purchased and delivered to my door for less than the cost of driving to a bookshop.

The classics are not gone and are still a massive part of the entire education curriculum from primary school to PhD level so this comment is ridiculous coming from a teacher. He knows damn rightly which books are studied. Or he should. And if he doesn’t then there is something seriously wrong.

And here’s the thing. The classics are great. But so are many, many wonderful books that have come since. Am I supposed to disregard everything written in the last 100 years? How limiting would that be for both literature and development?

Last week I saw a mother sitting on a bench in a shopping mall with her young baby, sampling the milk from its bottle, to make sure it was the right temperature and flowed freely. It was a beautiful and very serene scene of motherly care. Will that same mother, in thirteen years time, when that baby becomes an opinionated young teenager, be able to offer the same care? Will the mother sample the literature that it reads like it did the baby’s bottle, check out the screen pictures, the Internet, or will she be usurped by her child who by then will certainly not be seeking sensible literature, but will almost certainly follow the masses, the modern trends, for whom reading will have become a thing of the past. This is the age of the mentally ill child, the obsessive age, the age where celebrities affect the lives of those who have been encouraged to adore them and who wish to be like them, but never can. This is a trap of falsehood for children.

On one hand I see where he is coming from and I’ve complained about a lot of these things myself. But I don’t think that censoring READING is really the problem here – do you?

I stand for the old-fashioned values of traditional literature,

I want to draw attention to this line in particular and I want you to remember it. He said

I stand for the old-fashioned values of traditional literature,

So let’s talk about those values shall we:

classical poetry, Wordsworth,

A hippy who thought everyone should roam the country and that living in towns and cities and general industrial development was evil and immoral.


Writes shallow work that equates physical beauty with worth and life.


Many of his works, such as Hymn to Intellectual Beauty are concerned with the supernatural (which I thought we were against?)


Racist who wrote about ghosts and death.

Shakespearean plays,

Rape, murder, incest, misogyny. Great ‘values’ there.

and the great writers who will still be read in future years by those children whose parents adopt a protective attitude towards ensuring that dark, demonic literature, carefully sprinkled with ideas of magic, of control and of ghostly and frightening stories that will cause the children who read them to seek for ever more sensational things to add to those they have already been exposed to.

Such as all the works you have just suggested? Hmm.

What then of their subconscious minds? What then of the minds of children whose parents couldn’t give the time to look closely at childhood; the sensitive period of the development of every human being? Where will this addiction to unacceptable literature lead?

Those children grew up happy because they weren’t hampered by some adult trying to prevent them developing and growing by dictating to them what they were old enough or mature enough to handle and instead treated them with enough respect to allow them to grow at THEIR OWN PACE and not the pace we adults dictate for them.

I want children to read literature that is conducive to their age and leave those mystical and frightening texts for when they can discern reality, and when they have first learned to love beauty.

Except….look at what you just recommended?

Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Game of Thrones, The Hunger Games, and Terry Pratchett, to mention only a few of the modern world’s ‘must-haves’, contain deeply insensitive and addictive material which I am certain encourages difficult behaviour in children;

And you have a psychology PhD that will back up that assumption? No? Oh dear. Well, have you READ any of those books? No? You just pulled a couple of names of popular books from the shelves of Waterstones and tried to shoehorn them into your argument to make you seem up to date, didn’t you? Hmmm….well then. Maybe you shouldn’t talk about what you don’t know.

Here’s the thing. I’ve read all the books listed and have my own thoughts on them. I the Lord of the Rings at a very young age and I can say that all I learned from it was bravery, loyalty and lots of songs about leaves.

Game of Thrones REALLY isn’t a children’s books, and including it on this list makes me think you really have no idea.

Harry Potter I adore. As a reader and a writer. It was a series that got so, so many children passionate about reading, and the magical elements in the story pale in comparison to what is essentially a tale about friendship and love and honesty and courage and doing the right thing even when the whole world is against you. Kids learn a lot from Harry Potter.

Terry Pratchett I started reading very young and continued reading right up until his death. As regular readers know my love of his work is very deep and impacted so much of not only my own work, but my development as a person. His work is deeply thoughtful, intelligent, visionary. It taught me about love and politics and religion and war and poverty and kindness and cruelty and the reality that is life. Good ‘values’ to have, right? I honestly think that his work made me a better person. And I think you would be hard pushed to find a reader of his books who doesn’t feel the same way, at least in part. So including him on this list is both wrong and hugely disrespectful of the wonderful body of social commentary that he left behind.

yet they can be bought without a special licence, and can damage the sensitive subconscious brains of young children, many of whom may be added to the current statistics of mentally ill young children. For young adults, this literature, when it can be understood for what it is, is the choice of many!

Reading fantasy makes children mentally ill.

You heard it here first folks.

I actually don’t have the words to voice how angry this sweeping, unjustified and frankly STUPID statement is.

Buying sensational books is like feeding your child with spoons of added sugar, heaps of it, and when the child becomes addicted it will seek more and more, which if related to books, fills the bank vaults of those who write un-sensitive books for young children!

So…kids reading is a bad thing? Because that’s what I’m getting out of this ridiculous statement. Honestly, if a kid reads something of mine and loves it so much they go and read someone else’s book then I’m cheering them on. Because kids SHOULD read. And we should be encouraging them to.

And I’m not buying all this ‘sensational’ crap either – have you ever listened to the games that children make up when playing among themselves. I mean, REALLY listened. They are full of magic and princesses and witches and balls and talking animals – just like they have ALWAYS been and probably always will be.  Kids have a far bigger imagination that we can ever comprehend as adults. If they chose to read about those things they ALREADY have created in their imagination then so what?  Let them. Let them read as much and as widely and as passionately as they want to.

I just don’t understand why an educator would EVER suggest that a child shouldn’t be encouraged to read. Honestly. This man and his view are truly frightening when coming from someone who is responsible for the education and development of children on a daily basis. I sure as hell wouldn’t want him teaching my child with this opinion.

It is the duty of parents to spend time to study such matters and form their own conclusions, not to think that because the world is filled with such sensational literature they have to have it for their children, because everyone else does! Beware the devil in the text! Choose beauty for your young children!

Jesus Christ. The way he talks you’d think we were all handing our kids copies of Fifty Shades. I operate a basic screening in our house – if you can reach it you can read it. Really OBVIOUSLY inappropriate books are on the top shelf and the kids respect that. But in all honesty kids are smart – they aren’t interested in my Val McDermid’s, and they lost interest in the Terry Pratchett’s as soon as they realised that it was one long chapter (hehe).

Book covers are carefully designed to appeal to a certain audience – a quick look at ANY bookshop will tell you this – again another sign that this guy hasn’t bothered to do any sort of research into this at all. Kids books all look similar – bright colours, cartoonish. If a child has read a book with that sort of cover and liked it then it will be attracted to a different book with a similar cover. For instance, you don’t see many books in the childrens section with black covers, do you? But the YA section is full of them.

Honestly. This guy is talking through his hole and I’m actually embarrassed for him and seriously worried about the kids in his care. If I were a parent with kids at that school I would be asking some serious questions right about now.

I’m off to calm down.

Chat later.

Love, etc





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